Giddy Green

I've decided if I believed in reincarnation I'd believe that I used to be a little girl in another life.

But not a little girl the way I was twenty-five years ago. 
But a little girl who found the fountain of youth and never grew up.

Just because I could.
Because age six and three quarters suited me just fine.
Because I looked really good in pink tutus.

I am terribly impatient.
I mean, ridiculously, stubbornly annoying as hell I want it all and I want it delivered by cute, naked men impatient.

My six year old niece probably has more patience than I do.


I met a boy.

A very cute, very charming, total nerd of a boy.

But I totally dig guys who are kids at heart, who like cartoons and whose voices still sometimes crack like they're going through puberty at age thirty-two.

I find them endearing.

And wonder of wonders this boy seemed to be equally as taken with me.
Which is never how this works.

I'll like a guy and he'll be indifferent.
Or the guy will find me AMAZING and I'll find him entirely uninteresting.

It is rare a Katharine Hepburn meets her Spencer Tracy.

But only on screen, because well, he was already married.

I actually got into such a flutter about it all I stayed up most of the night thinking about it.
I was like a teenage girl doodling his name on her notebook.

So now I'm sitting here, my inner six year old dancing the twirl of impatience, wondering when and if he's going to ask me out.

And I totally had to laugh at myself and my impatience.

Good grief, Reese.
When was the last time you had a crush like this?

A long time.
Like, in a galaxy far far away.
In Galaxy Coffee, that is.

So couldn't I just revel and delight in the crush itself?

Why do I always do that?
Why do I always have to take something that's great and long for it to be something else entirely?

I thought of all my girlfriends in unhappy relationships and the constant headaches they deal with every week and I wondered why I was so eager to be rid of my freedom.

The grass is always greener.

But sometimes, in these rare moments when I actually stop looking ahead and look down at what's below my feet I see the sparkling emeralds beneath me.

Green with possibility.

And ain't no one gonna top that.
No sir.