...The Spotless Mind...

I had my own Eternal Sunshine moment on Halloween.
Which I've decided is either really freaky or really rad.

I was meeting some friends at a bar I've never been to and I arrived first.
I sat at the bar next to a Storm Trooper and took in the room.
There was a live band playing and the place was pretty packed.
There were a lot of attractive men there.
I mean, a LOT.
Gotta love Halloween.

There were a couple of guys who I was immediately drawn to and to my surprise they were nearly twins.
Tall, lanky bearded guys who smiled a lot.
It seems my ex has cursed me with a type.
Damn PC.

It was nice being out, the energy of new people, the anticipation of what the night might bring.
I felt really beautiful that night and it seemed reflected in each gentlemen's eyes.
When Maggie got to the bar she asked me to go to the powder room with her which was on the opposite side of the bar.
We passed one of the guys I'd been scamming on earlier and I noticed from behind how much hotter he was up close.
Men aren't the only ones who appreciate a nice ass.

The ladies room had a long line so Maggie and I piled into the mens washroom and left the gentleman waiting his turn giggling as we stumbled out together.
Still laughing we passed the same group of people again and the tall drink of water who had grabbed my attention was now sitting at the table facing us.
I glanced his way and continued walking.
Then stopped.
I looked at him again.
No, I thought. It couldn't be. Could it?

Maggie, I think that guy is Richie.
What? she asked. Really?
Yeah. Unless I'm delusional.

I walked over to the stranger and tapped him on the shoulder.
He turned around and a smile lit his face when he saw me.
He gave me a hug and my mind reeled over the fact that I'd been drawn to a guy I'd already dated.

Are we really so predictable and tedious as to repeat our same actions?
Over and over and over again?

Not only was my attraction amusing, the fact I was running into him at all was mildly alarming.
I'd asked a dozen friends last minute what they were up to that evening and the only one going out was my friend, Maggie.
And the place she was headed to happened to be the place Richie was, a guy I hadn't seen in at least a month.

Life does crazy things sometimes.

I ended up meeting another attractive stranger I enjoyed talking to that night.
And I don't know if I'll ever see him again.
That's the tragic beauty of nights, I guess.

I talked to a lot of people I didn't know and was so buzzed and distracted by everything I lacked the social graces to simply say It was nice meeting you and instead would finish a sentence and then abruptly walk away without saying anything.  It was like my body physicalized the expression, Ooh look! Something shiny!
I didn't even say goodbye to the new stranger I'd delighted in.
And I liked him.

But I did say goodbye to Richie.
And maybe that moment, that night, was simply existing for that.
Sometimes I think things are far less complicated than we realize.
And the few times we pause and take a second glance are usually the times we finally see what all is there.
And sometimes, what all isn't.