Cutting puppet strings

I don't like being told what to do.  Don't. Like. It.
My aversion to direction is so off the charts it is probably listed somewhere in some book under psychotic disorders.  Once when I had just started dating Narcissus he told me I should paint my toes red when I got my pedicure because you know, red would look pretty against my white skin.  I got so irrationally upset with him the poor foreigner was understandably confused.
Clearly, I have a sensitivity on the subject I'm gonna need the grace of God to overcome.  Today ain't that day.

Grownups know a lot.  Yes, I know I am technically a grownup and my new job and latest diamond ring purchase do make me feel like one.  But there are still plenty of real grownups (and by that I mean, older) who have years of experience and vaults of knowledge to impart.  And I appreciate that.  Really.  I do.  And often they are right.  Totally onboard with your wisdom.  But when the advice is coupled with condescension, with mocking ridicule over the unliklihood that I will actually follow through on being so responsible?  Well then I kind of wanna kick your cane from under you and watch you bruise your chin. 

I'm NOT an idiot.  And I have NO patience when I'm being treated as one.  Speak your thoughts, offer counsel and then let me live my life!  Even GOD has given me free will can you not respect my right as a human to fail and fumble and bruise my own fabulous chin if I so desire?

Even as kids we want to feel our opinions matter.  We want to pick out our clothes.  We want to carry it ourselves.  I want to be trusted enough to be given room to move.  If you really doubt my ability to function as a capable adult then why don't you pray the big G prompts me to do things?
Oooh.  Got ya there.
But then they'd have to get their hands out of it and controllers like to be in control.  And I'm savvy enough to pick up on that.  Which is why I grind my teeth whenever it happens.
DO.NOT.TELL.ME.WHAT.TO.DO.
You cannot control me. 
I will find a way to gain my own authority back. 
If anyone is capable of anything it's this chick.
Leave me the fuck alone and we can enjoy our library books in peace.