Veronica's Jeremiad

Veronica felt quite the fool.
The past months' roller coaster of events had left her inconsolable.
She was an avid pursuer of truth and as such evasive answers always dissatisfied her.
The man she'd agreed to let back into her life had once again shut her out as their closeness gave way to intimacy.  It seemed a rather cruel trick worming your way back into ones daily thoughts, excessively doting on them with overwhelming praise then becoming so frightened at such intensities as to end all relations by a quick route of escape.

She felt dizzy and tired. 
Somewhere between sadness and anger in a state of disillusionment. 
She could not lie and wish none of it had taken place. 
But she also could not ignore the after effects that left her heart paralyzed with doubt.  Such conflict love always seemed to bring.  Such ecstasy always coupled with misery. 
Veronica affirmed her hurt excelled the value of complacency.  But she feared such continued abuse, years of love swerving, was silently taking its toll.

Love must always believe the best.  But in truth or of vital necessity?  Believing what all looked to be filled Veronica's heart with shame and regret, the manipulations and faulty declarations prompted her to admit her gullibility and willingness to devour such lies. 
But an undercurrent within her urged her to hold onto her secret truth; that the love that had once seemed to be, the love that had looked to her with desperately pleading eyes was as real as the ache now choking her breaths.  Surely he, distracted in his desperation though he attempted to be, felt equally all Veronica did, longed for the nervous anticipation they'd left in overcast afternoons, and silently took comfort as night fell and they allowed their thoughts to find one another once again.

It was either true or merely another lie.  But Veronica had swallowed so many jagged words that she feared another would do her in, her eyes still stinging from believing such falsities.  So she accepted her ray of hope with silent reverie.  And asserted that what was true for all was never all that was true for Veronica.