The other morning this mother came into Starbucks with her daughter. The young girl must have been about 12 or 13, entering that age where everything your parents say and do is sooooo annoying. There was a long line, it was that busy time of the morning and the girl didn't know what she wanted when they finally got to the register. So as the mother tried to press her to make a decision hurriedly the young girl refused to want anything and whispered venomously, "You're such a GOOD mom." The woman looked at me and I tried to pretend I hadn't heard the daughter but her face just broke my heart. She wasn't mad as you would think most parents would be. She didn't even seem embarassed, she just looked tired. She even got back in line, that long busy morning line with her daughter again a few minutes later so the young girl could order what she had finally decided she wanted. And then as they sat there for awhile I looked up and saw them and realized we'd forgotten one of their drinks. Of all the people in that cafe to forget a drink it had to be that poor woman's drink. The woman again didn't even have the energy to be upset about having to wait so long. She just sat there, tired, exhausted and when I brought a free drink coupon over to her she barely saw me she was so deep in her mind, likely summoning the strength to get through another day.
I thought about that woman a lot that day. About how even though all the circumstances justified her reacting and getting upset, she calmly chose to act with love instead. Love to reject the bait of her smart mouthed unappreciative daughter. Love to wait patiently when she had to wait longer than anyone else for a simple smoothie. Love to ignore the emotions likely bouncing around in her mind and choose to be quiet instead.
Love is a choice. Joy is a choice. If we're gonna let our emotions and our circumstances dictate our day to day lives then we're gonna have a long, miserable life. And I like being happy, thank you. I like choosing to ignore the venom around me.
Someone I see regularly I used to dread seeing. He was such a negative, condescending presence to be around. I would literally heave a heavy sigh when I'd realize my path would cross his. 'Thank you Lord for teaching me patience,' I would pray and begin emotionally preparing myself for the infectious negativity that he'd bring with him. And then, something incredible happened. I was around him and instead of his pretention, he was pleasant. I nearly fell over I was so shocked! And thinking it to be a fluke I was cautious around him the next time I saw him and sure enough, he was pleasant AGAIN! Several days passed and I found him sitting next to me and we were having an enjoyable conversation. And the next time I knew my path was going to cross his I was actually looking FORWARD to seeing him! Being the confrontational woman I am, I asked him why the change. "Were you invaded by aliens or something?" I asked him. "You're nice now. What happened to you?" And he said, "I just decided that wasn't me, I'm not a mean person and I decided to be nice." He decided, he CHOSE to change how he was and that little decision, that little choice was already having an effect on his life, it was affecting the people around him. I liked the bastard, for crying out loud! If that isn't testimony to the power of choice I don't know what is!
If we would step out of what we've settled on, the choices we've convinced ourselves are what we deserve, how things have to be, how they ought to be, they SHOULD be (that damn word 'should' needs to be eradicated from our language) and if instead we got over ourselves, stopped being so selfish and thought about how our choices affected those around us maybe we'd stop being so dissatisfied and unhappy.
We can decide we're gonna put on love. Stop being led by your feelings and listening to your emotions. They are fickle. They are like the inconstant moon. We know what choices make us happy and which ones bring us death instead of life. So why do we keep making wrong choices simply because it seems like what we should be doing? How about you get out of your head and into your spirit and tell your feelings to just simmer down and listen to what's sitting quietly right in your heart. It would be AMAZING the changes that would happen if you started using your will to make right choices. Maybe the people around you would start looking forward to your presence instead of ignoring your phone calls and putting you in the box with all the other cast offs.
As a man thinks in his heart, so is he. Proverbs 23:7
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