I'll have what she's having

"When you're single, the world is your oyster," said Ms. Samantha Jones. Of course having one to snuggle up with on the couch isn't so bad either, but perhaps a bit more predictable. I overheard someone make the comment that they grew up in Newberg and then moved to California. "And I never thought I'd live in Newberg AGAIN. But then I got married....." was how their story went.


And I don't know why I heard that because the rest of their conversation I was whole heartedly ignoring but that just seemed to stick out to me somehow.



...I never thought I'd.....



I certainly never thought I'd be working for Starbucks again, that's for sure. Nor did I imagine most things would have fallen into the places they have but maybe that's the idea. I'm not sure. But I am sure that most everyone at some point if not daily compares what they have and don't to what she has and has more of.



I also in the past few weeks have had drinks with someone who auditioned for the film I'm doing and wasn't cast. And someone who auditioned for the play I'm rehearsing and wasn't cast. And then of course there's the show I auditioned for and wasn't cast. I guess it's too obvious to be worth reiterating.....



But what if I got all those things I so greatly wanted every time I so greatly wished their existence? Eesh. I pity the thought. Of course because I'm working jobs I don't want I've met people I adore. And because I'm not living alone like I'd prefer I save on groceries. And I get to see my Mom every day. And because I wasn't cast in those shows someone else was who was able to meet them which led them to......well, you get the idea.



But if it's all so obvious why the want? Why the need to be where they are and have what they have? I'm pretty sure if I was married and forced to move somewhere not of my choosing and remembering the shows I performed 15 years ago instead of now I wouldn't be who I am or where I'm to be. And it certainly 'tis grand to note how easily thrilled we are about things and again how quickly we forget that joy and move on to remorse over not getting the new thing or person or gig or dress we knew was just right for us.



Of course, I'm sure if it wasn't so unbearably hot the whole scene would have played out a lot differently. Some like it hot and some like it balmy and arid. And perhaps the insight would have led to a renewed desire for something else. Something borrowed. Something not quite for you.