I logged onto this absurd site to read my messages and found the most entertaining major one EVER! I laughed so hard I fell off my chair. The bruise was totally worth it.
Oh fair maiden Profoundly moved by your ad. At a loss as to how to respond, since I am totally. Stubbornly unable to admit defeat, and, in any case, find it less painful to engage in this utterly futile enterprise than to lie awake bemoaning the cruel misfortune of having become enraptured by Nature's Fairest Creation, of whom I am no doubt unworthy. Have mercy, and say a little prayer for your devoted admirer, who shall remain forever sundered from you by the vagaries of the harsh fate of being born mortal, alas, merely mortal.
In tears, I am nevertheless yours,
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