thirty days have september....april....june.....and.....and.....

Today marks my return home now for one month, which is kinda wild because I'm not sure if it feels longer than that or shorter or like I never really left but had an Alice walking through the looking glass experience. Whatever the mirror, I do feel a bit like Dorothy and the colors around this Oz have seemed to shift their hue. I left needing a change, which I found. And I returned seeking the familiar, which I have also found. Regardless of what did and should not have happened, I did find something. And it's nice to finally understand a breath of a fact more about the one person who's with you every rabbit hole you fall down.




I'm remembering why I appreciate my parents so much......what a blessing it is to have people who love you so much present in your life.....how amazing it is to have a little girl run into a room shouting your name with glee just because she gets to see you.....how nice it is to be able to talk to my brother.....and work out with my best friend....to even have friends around who understand you and don't think you're crazy or at least understand your particular brand of crazy.....that it really is ok if everyone doesn't like you because they never will. And paying any thought to those prevents you from blessing who's right across the table.....how fortunate I am to still have my options open.....how awesome it is to grab dinner and a movie solo on a Friday night. I sat at the bar and was almost done with my food while others still waited for their table. And at the packed movie theatre, I nabbed a single seat in my favorite row, the one where you can put your feet up on the bars in front of you, while packs of people eyed the aisles from the side lines.....I learned that sometimes you can land a role that was made for you and not have to spend time in the wings of that theatre as a mere chorus girl......yet again......sometimes you can find a job that you enjoy, where you work with kids who enjoy you and people who are actually....glad you're there....your presence isn't a burden or a disappointment or a conflict that would never resolve. But it inspires. And blesses. And sometimes the people you thought were one way surprise you....for the better though at times, disheartening.....and for every let down, eventually the rain subsides and the colors that emerge create a bow anew. And while your thoughts may stray his way in quiet moments, the creative drive within allows only new breaths to tick away the tocking beats.....to this new day. This renewed Reese. And all she hopes this day might bring......